7 Bridge Walk around Sydney

This is the map of the 7 Bridge Walk I did yesterday with a friend off CK. It turned out to be a 24 km walk and all up I walked 28 km yesterday.

It took us all day to walk it. We started off at the Rocks and the 2nd half of the course was so hard. I didn't realise that Sydney was so hilly especially between Lane Cove and Milsons Point.

We had a great day and was for 4 great charities.

I was so tired and sore last night. Still a bit sore today and it's hard to walk sometimes. Hope this goes away.

I also made by October goal this morning. Very excited about that. Now time to focus on my christmas goal.

I also make an agreement with my CK friend to kick my butt if I don't exercise during the working week. I have to look my best for when David comes to visit. Yes he has agreed to visit me instead of me going to see him. Just need to work out when but the project he is doing in Nigeria will probably decide that.

Carlton

One Step at a time.

Can't believe there is 1 single sweet guy in the world.

Yes as the title suggests I can't believe how sweet David (yes that's his name) is. I got the following email this morning from him, whilst reading it, it is fairly similar to yesterday's one. I think there is only a few lines different.

God must have had you in mind,
When He spread stars in the sky;
For I can see them twinkling,
Every time I look into your eyes.

He must have been thinking of you,
When He made the moon and the sun;
He knew that they would shine down on you,
Like you were the only one.

I know when He made the mountains,
The beautiful flowers and morning dew;
When He looked at the masterpiece of what He'd done,
He had to be thinking of you.

When He created all humanity,
You had to be on His mind;
Looking across all the generations,
He made you one of a kind.

I know when the very first laughter,
Spilled over from Heaven's place;
God knew one day He would hear you laugh too,
And a smile spread across His face.
You had to be on His mind,
When He gave His only one Son;
For He gave him up to die for you,
As if you were his chosen one.

I'm so glad God had you in mind,
Looking down from the Heavens above;
When it was my turn to get that special someone,
And he sent You, for me to love.

Ok David was actually born in USA and migrated to UK about 6 years ago for work. He is currently working on a project in Nigeria and the phone system suxs big time.

Yah I got to speak with David (that's the guys name) last night, but we only got to speak for 3 mins before getting cut off. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Bloody Nigeria and its lack of phone service.He's working in Nigeria at the moment and apparently it took him an hour to get through to me. Very bad service in Nigeria. I so hope we can chat again soon. I've been trying to ring him back but can't get through. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr he sounds so good on the phone, his accent is a mix between American and English.

All up we actually spoke for only 5 mins but it was so cool and good to hear his voice. In the end we went back to chatting via yahoo messenger. Its also cheaper too............

I'm rather excited about life at the moment and it was so great to talk to him on the phone last night, even if it was only for a few mins. I so hate the Nigerian phone system and he is there for at least a month. Its going to drive me insane. We talked about meeting up last night and I think I've talked him into coming to Australia, rather than me going to UK to met him. He sent me another beautiful poem this morning. Can't believe how sweet this man is. I sometime think it is too good to be true.

Carlton
Take One Step at a time.

Made my morning.

When I checked my emails this morning I woke up to the following email from the man I've been chatting to on the net.

Whenever i miss you, a star falls from the skies;
So if one night you look up into the skies and you found no stars;
Then its all your fault cos you made me miss you toooooooooooo much.
have a pleasant day sweetie

Later during this morning I got the following email

God must have had you in mind,
When He spread stars in the sky;
For I can see them twinkling,
Every time I look into your eyes.

He must have been thinking of you,
When He made the moon and the sun;
He knew that they would shine down on you,
Like you were the only one.

I know when He made the mountains,
The beautiful flowers and morning dew;
When He looked at the masterpiece of what He'd done,
He had to be thinking of you.

When He created all humanity,
You had to be on His mind;
Looking across all the generations,
He made you one of a kind.

I know when the very first laughter,
Spilled over from Heaven's place;
God knew one day He would hear you laugh too,
And a smile spread across His face.

You had to be on His mind,
When He gave His only one Son;
For He gave him up to die for you,
As if you were his chosen one.

I'm so glad God had you in mind,
Looking down from the Heavens above;
When it was my turn to get that special someone,
And he sent You, for me to cherish

Ok the 2nd one is a little too religious for me but I think it was still very sweet of him to send me these.

Some times I think is this guy for real and are there really people out there that are this sweet. but I have to think outside the square of my past and realise that not all people are bad people and there are some nice ones out there.

Carlton
Take One Step at a Time.

New Relationships.

I think I have found myself a potential new man. Only problem is I haven't met him yet and he lives on the other side of the world - UK. So far he is saying all the right things and doing all the right things as well. He travels for work and is in Asia at the moment and continues to make the effort to find a computer and be online for us to chat.

I've even told him about briefly about the stuff that's happened in my life over the past 3 years and he's reply was that makes it more reason for him to take care of me and look after me, physically and emotionally.

From our discussions he is such a sweet guy and has even given me his phone number already. Only problem is that I can't ring ISD from my home phone. If I have time, will ring the phone company and see about getting that changed.

I just can't seem to get enough of him. Not sure where this will all go considering the time differences and distance (half a world away) but we will see.

Sorry just had to share with you all. I actually love all of the attention this guy is giving me, even if it is only on line at this stage.

Yes before you all tell me to be very careful, I have already thought about this and will be very careful. Its not as if I'm about to pack up and move to London to be with this guy I hardly know. Its just exciting getting some positive attention from a guy and getting to know someone new.

Carlton
Take One Step at a time.

D day has arrived for my Interview.

Well today was D Day, yes it has come around so very fast. I feel like I haven't had enough time to prepare for my interview this afternoon but then again no matter how much I revise my presentation all I want to do is change it.

About 6 p.m. got home from the interview. It was in the city and wasn't until 3.30 p.m. today. I was incredible nervous all day to the point I had problems eating but the closer the time of the interview came the calmer I got. I think the interview went well and I did my best. I'm actually pretty happy with how it all went overall.

There comments were that I did really well and they like the visual aids and the actual power point presentation format that I used. I think I even got a few more brownie points as I had copies of the presentation for them to keep. They said I asked some very good questions and like that I had put in a lot of research and preparation of the interview.

When I asked for feedback and if I had any gaps to work on, all they would say is that I did really well and they will go away and look at the 3 interviews and let us know within 2 days.

The actual job is with the company I already work for, so I will be just an internal transfer. They also told me that they only interviewed 3 people for the role and I actually work with one of them.

I gave it my best shot and if I don't get it I'm happy that I got to the final 3 and I gave it a go. I will find out within the next few days if I got it or not.

The whole experience has made me feel very motivated and that I can do anything I want to.

Carlton
Take One Step at a Time.

October 2006 Goal

My goal for the month of October is to reach double figures for the very last time. Well I weighted in yesterday and I'm getting closer. Just under 1 kilos to go to my goal and 10 days to do it.

I' m very excited about it. I can do it.

Life has been very busy the past week, yet again I'm doing 3 jobs. A few weeks ago I applied for another job with the company I work for and I got an interview. In fact the interview is tomorrow afternoon and will go for 90 Min's. During this interview I have to do a 15 min presentation and spend much of the past week focusing on this and my interview technique. I will be so clad when this interview is over and I can relax a little, well that is until they tell me if I got the job or not.

Well I better go and do some more preparation for this interview. The job I applied for is one that I want to get very much, I have always wanted to get into this type of work but have never had the courage or confidence to apply for the roles.

Carlton
Take One Step at a Time.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr my life the past week.

Work is just grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr at the moment. so much pressure coming from the boss about finding new lending deals its not funny......... As my assistant is on leave and the other manager has had to take leave (both her parents are sick), he expects me to do it all plus go out and find new business........................... To make is worse I am so over this job. I want and need a change......................... The boss is great but has so been on my back the past few weeks, what am an a bloody miracle worker......... With doing 3 jobs again, when do I have the time to find new business........................
Sorry for the whinge but this is just one of the many things going around in my mind at the moment. I do have a job interview on Monday afternoon and because I'm so busy at work, have to prepare for it, including the 15 min presentation I need to do as part of it at home. The interview is expected to go for 90 mins. I so hope I get this job, its a job I have always wanted to do but have either never had the confidence to apply for it or enough experience to do it.

My love life is also grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr exbf still wants to get back together but from what I am seeing it's only for 2 reasons, he wants the sex and in his adult life he has never been single and doesn't like the feeling of being single. For me that's not good enough reasons. I have told him all I am offering is my friendship and see where that takes us. We spoke the other night for a 90 mins regarding life and our relationship and I'm still only prepared to give him friendship. He is coming to Sydney in a few weeks time and it will be the first time I will have seen him since we split up. It will be an interesting but hard time, especially with all of the feelings I still have for him and the sex with him was fantastic. I do miss it but am not prepared to settle for 2nd best. I need to be strong with my decisions about our relationship and not cave in and have sex.

In the meantime last week I met a guy on line who wants to do the friends with benefits thing. Normally I wouldn't do that but he is so cute and its been a while I actually thought about it. We have been emailling each other and things go rather heated. He so wants to met me but the more things go on the more I'm not keen to do the friends with benefits. I think I better be honest with him and tell him this. I also have a few other men wanting to get to know me as well.

When I spoke with exbf the other night I was honest with him and told him about these other guys interested in seeing me etc. I wasn't sure how he would take it and seemed to take things rather well. He even told me to go and have some fun with them but that's not me.

I was so hoping that blogging this would help but not sure that it has. It has given me even more to think about. I'm not enjoying my life at the moment.

Carlton
Take one step at a time.

Light Bulb Moments

Yes I had several light bulb moments tonight and they came during a conversation with exbf.

We were talking about lots of different things including how hard it has been for both of us following the split up, how he misses the sex and just having someone there for him. To a point I too miss this, but not enough to go back to a bad relationship. I told him I could still be there for him but as his friend only.

The conversation went on a bit more and it sounded like he was trying to manipulate the conversation and convince me to get back together. Until a few little while ago, I probably would have jumped at the chance to go back, just so I could say I have a bf and someone in my life. I now know that's not what I want in life. I actually confronted him about this and said that if I didn't know better that he was trying to convince me that we should get back together and he actually said he was. I told him all I was interested in was trying to be his friend and things would need to dramatically change prior to even thinking about anything else. We would need to communicate effectively and try to be friends first and most importantly, there is not going to be any sex between us. I also told him that if he came to visit I would be able to resist him and he would be sleeping in the spare room.

At the end of the day all he wants is sex and he isn't going to get it from me. He has a lot of baggage in his life that needs to be sorted out before he can go into another relationship. Whilst I would like to have someone in my life I'm also not ready for such a commitment either. I have lots of things I need to sort out in my life and about myself.

I have been through a lot of stuff, some good but mostly bad during the past 3 years and feel that I am finally coming out the other side, which is a good feeling in it self. I am also finally discovering that I am a lot stronger than I give myself credit for and I am no longer going to take 2nd best.

The light bulb moments are:-

1. Standing up for myself and confronting exbf about his manipulation.
2. Telling exbf that we will not be having sex again and that yes I can resist him.
3. That I only want to be his friend, nothing more.
4. I deserve more than what he has to offer.
5. I am a strong person and I have control over my life.

I am very proud with myself on how I handled the discussion. I also came away feeling good about myself and how I handled the conversation.

I even told him some of the things that I want in a partner:-

* Some one who loves me for who I am,
* Doesn't take me for granted,
* Does what he says he is going to do, when he says he is going to do it.
* Makes me laugh and laughs with me (not at me).
* I feel comfortable with and love spending time with.
* Makes me feel loved.
* Someone I can spoil and spoil me.
* Seems like I missed the most important one of all and that's friendship. Would be lost without this one.
* A few common interests.

At this point in time, he can't give me any of this, so I'm not interested in being his girlfriend.

This might not seem like much of a break through, but they are very big steps for me, especially when I do feel vunerable about being single and wanting to have company in my life.

Sorry for carrying on for so long but needed to get a few things off my chest regarding this part of my life. I also appear to be back in the grove and am getting on with my life.

Carlton
Take one Step at Time.

Weight Loss Goals

Hi everyone I thought is was time I updated you all on my latest weight loss goals. I haven't meantioned losing weight for a while and you all probably thought I'd given up on it. Well I haven't.

My first goal is to get to double digits again by the end of October 2006.
This time its going to be for good. Yes I have been in double digits twice during this journey but due to stress etc I've found by self back in triple digits. Well enough is enough and its time for them to go. The good news is I am getting closer to double digits and am only 2.3 kilos away.

My 2nd goal is to be under 90 kilos by the end of 2006. This will be a bit of a stretch but if I stay focused and exercise everyday I can do it.

Some of you know that I had a car accident early September and there was $7500 damage to it. Well I thought I'd post some photos for you to see. The good news is that the car is all fixed now and looks brand new.


This is one of the photos.








This is from the other angle.







As the accident happened on a Saturday morning it took them just over a week to fix the car. Which I thought was pretty good.

Carlton
Take One Step at a time.

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR - CATS

The Grrrrrrrrrrrrr is aimed at Zelda (pictured here). I spend most of yesterday trying to occupy my dad, my brother and myself as it was the anniversary of mum's death.

Well I got home a lot later than I thought I would and the cats didn't like it. When I was feeding the cats and cleaning up the kitty litter mess, Zelda decided that she had to pee on the carpet next to one of my audio stands. That alone would have made me mad but she also had to pee on my Italian leather handbag, some F1 merchandise I haven't gotten framed yet (now it smells of cat pee) and right on the power board. The only way I knew was I heard this hissing or sizzling noise and went to investigate. When I did I saw smoke coming out of it and the sizzling of liquid.

I am so angry with her, she hasn't had much to do with me since. I keep thinking that if this had happened when I wasn't home then it could have turned ugly and started a fire.

Sorry just had to whinge about this and get it out of my system.

Carlton
Take One Step at a time.

1st Anniversary

Today is a special day, its the first anniversary of my mum's death. I can't believe 12 months has past, it has gone so fast.

It seems like only a few months ago that we spend the weekend in the hospital very sadly watching her die and not being able to do anything about it.

The picture here is my mum on her wedding day - 14/11/54. As this is such a lovely dress and picture, I thought I'd share it will you all.

Whilst I have spend the past 12 months mourning my mum and been going through so tough times, today is the day that I have to start living again.

Mum would want me to live again and would probably be a little disappointed with my reaction over the past 12 months. But what is done is done. My mum was such a special person who I could talk to about anything and would not judge me too much. She would just listen and then try to help me out. She would also do anything for me and go without if I needed something.

From today on it's time to look after myself and life life again. I will never forget my mum and I hope that the pain of losing her will start to subside a little.

I'm off shortly to the cemetery and visit her cremation plot.

Carlton
Take one step at a time.

Yes I'm still around

Sorry guys I am still around and sorry for not posting for a while. Just realised it's been a month. Didn't realise it was that long.

To be honest my mind hasn't been in the right place to blogg. Sorry about that. My break up with exbf has taken its toll on me more emotionally, than I thought it would. We spoke on the phone tonite for the first time since we split and it was hard. Very emotional for me, I spend some of the time crying and I actually felt worse than when we started. I'm thinking that it was too soon for us to actually talk on the phone. We have been sending the odd text message and that I can handle but can't seem to handle talking to him just yet. Wonder if I ever will.

One thing I found good with our talking was that it took him about 45 mins into the conversation for him to say something that annoyed me and that he is having a hard time getting over the relationship as well.

I'm still feeling pretty down about my life at the moment and feeling rather down.

My weight has gone up and down a few kilos since the break up and its starting to annoy me. I'm feeling very fat at the moment.

Well better go and get some sleep so I can get up early tomorrow and walk to work.

Carlton
Take one Step at a time.

Don't you Quit

DON'T YOU QUIT

When you've eaten too much and you can't write it down,
And you feel like the biggest failure in town.
When you want to give up just because you gave in,
and forget all about being healthy and thin.

So What!

You went over your calories a bit,
It's your next move that counts...So DON'T YOU QUIT!
It's a moment of truth,
it's an attitude change.

It's learning the skills to get back in your range.
It's telling yourself, "You've done great up till now.
You can take on this challenge and beat it somehow."

It's part of your journey toward reaching your goal.
You're still gonna make it, just stay in control.
To stumble and fall is not a disgrace, if you summon the will to get back in the race.
But, often the struggler's, when losing their grip,
Just throw in the towel and continue to slip.

And learn too late when the damage is done,that the race wasn't over...they still could have won.
Lifestyle change can be awkward and slow,but facing each challenge will help you grow.
Success is failure turned inside out,the silver tint in a cloud of doubt.
When you're pushing to the brink, just refuse to submit,
If you bite it, you write it...But

DON'T YOU QUIT !!!-

Author Unknown -

Carlton
One Step at a Time

Such an Emotional Day

I've had a rather rough day today emotionally. I've felt very flat, low and just lonely.

I've been so tempted to ring ex today to talk to him, didn't really have anything to say to him, just wanted to hear his voice. But I've keept strong and but keep telling myself I don't need to do that. Might just make me a little more emotional.

Tonight has been extremely tough, as I miss him so much. I'm glad I'm going away on Tuesday for a week and that will take my mind off him but its just so hard at the moment. I thought I was doing rather well up until today as I hadn't cried about the breakup since Saturday morning but tonight the flood gates opened up again.

I so hate looking at the reminders of him, like the things he bought me. Just makes it so much harder.

This part of life just sucks big time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sorry for rambing on but just had to get it out of me.

Carlton :
Take One Step at a Time.

Single Again

As the title indicated my partner and I have split up again. This time it is for good as far as I am concerned. He was us to be friends but that hasn't worked in the past and we get back into a relationship of some sorts. I have told him that as I don't want to be just friends, then all ties need to be cut and that I don't want anything to do with him again. I do not want him to ring me, email or visit me. It may should a little harsh as we have had some sort of relationship for over 4 1/2 years but it is the only way that I am going to be able to move on and get on with my life. I need to be selfish with this one. Needless to say he wasn't pleased.

The break up happened tonight and needless to say I've spend the past few hours crying and not being able to sleep. Not sure if I will be able to sleep but I will need to try as I have a very busy day at work tomorrow before I go on holidays for 2 weeks.

Things have been pretty rocky for the past month and if I honest with myself, I knew that the breakup was coming, but it still doesn't make it easy. I would so love to have him in my life as a friend but I can't do friends just now. Its too painful, maybe one day.

Now it is time for me to focus on me for a change and get on with my life and start losing some of this weight that I have regained.


Carlton
Take One Step at a Time.

Find Your Fairy

I found this site via an on line buddy of mine, Bec.

The online fairy site is found at http://www.emmadavies.net

My fairy is called Columbine Elftree
She is a cheerful sprite.
She lives in mushroom fields and quiet meadows.
She is only seen when the first leaves fall from the trees.
She wears lilac and purple like columbine flowers. She has delicate green wings like a cicada.

I so love lilac and purple and great to see my fairy wears these colours.


Carlton
Take One Step at a time.

Dr Phil's book the Ultimate Weight Loss Challenge

I've owned this book for approximately 2 1/2 years and have never fully read it. It seems when ever I start it something distracts me and I never finish it. I've decided that one of my goals this year is not only read the book but to put the keys into practice.

Key 1: Right Thinking
Lay aside self-defeating, invalid mindsets that do not work. They have the power to keep you from making different choices or developing new behaviors. Too often, we let these negative notions go unchallenged, and we act as though they were true. You must monitor what you're thinking and challenge whether it is true. If it's not working, replace it with thinking that works.

Key 2: Healing Feelings
Overcome emotional overeating by managing inappropriate reactions to stress; solving problems rather than dwelling on them; changing self-defeating thoughts, since more often than not, feelings follow thoughts; gaining closure on unfinished emotional business; and learning new ways to cope without resorting to food.

Key 2 is a big one for me.

Key 3: A No-Fail Environment
Design your world so that you can't help but succeed. This involves removing temptations to eat and rearranging your schedule in order to avoid or minimize triggers to overeat.

Key 4: Mastery Over Food and Impulse Eating
There's only one reason why you haven't changed the bad stuff in your life. You're getting something out of it. I'm not saying that you're getting something healthy or positive, but people do not continue in situations, attitudes or actions that do not give them a payoff. This key helps you identify those payoffs, unplug from them, and replace bad habits with healthy behavior.

Key 5: High-Response Cost, High-Yield Nutrition
To lose weight, you must choose foods that support good behavioral control over your eating, that is, high-response cost, high-yield foods, organized into a moderate, balanced, calorie-controlled plan to ensure weight loss.

Key 6: Intentional Exercise
Prioritize regular exercise into your life most days of the week — walking, jogging, aerobic dance classes, yoga, playing a sport, or lifting weights. Exercise does more than simply burn calories; it changes your self-perception so you stop labeling yourself as a couch potato.

Key 7: Your Circle of Support
Surround yourself with supportive, like-minded people who want you to lose weight and succeed at your health and fitness efforts.

from drphill.com

I was reading some old posts on Mary's blog and came across the above keys. It reminded me how far I have to go before getting my life under control and today is the first step towards doing just that.

Carlton
One Step at a time.

Confused

I'm a little confused with my actions at the moment, I so want to lose weight and be healthy but I keep sabotaging my efforts.

I have not tracked or eaten well during the past 3 days. I know it is related to my thoughts and feelings and what I feel about myself.

As a result of this I have changed my saying from Never pay for the same kilo twice to One Step at a time. This new saying is more in line with where I am at with my weight loss or lack of weight loss journey at the moment.

I would like to thank everyone for their kinds words over the past few days. I really appreciate it and have taken it all on board. I especially thank Mary for her kind words. I know I need to exercise and really hate getting up early to do it but I am going to make the effort to do so, as I am worth it.

My plan for exercise this week is:-

Tuesday - Walk to work 3.5 kms done & took 40 mins and walk home 3.5 km's done and took 40 mins.
Wednesday - Walk to work 3.5 kms done and took 40 mins and walk home 3.5 km's.
Thursday - Walk before work 30 mins and lunchtime walk on the treadmill - 30 mins.
Friday - Walk to work 3.5 kms and walk home 3.5 km's.

This will mean I will need to get up at 6.30 am instead of 7 a.m. and I can do it for me. Getting up 30 mins earlier might not seem much to some of you but it is huge for me. I am a night time person, who loves staying up till the early hours of the morning and hate getting up before 10 a.m.

Will update my progress as I do it.

Carlton
One step at a time.

New Beginnings

Weigh in was tonight and I found out why I am feeling so fat and like a pig at the moment. I have put on so much weight in the last 2 months its not funny.

Tomorrow is the start of a new weight watchers week for me and the start of new beginnings. I am going to be focused, exercise every day and track (try to stick to my 22 points). I already understand how out of control my eating is at the moment, and I hoping that this will help me curb my bad habits.

I tracked all of my food and points today via my weight loss blog, which was really good and made me feel really accountable to you all. I have begun to understand that just because people don't post comments, doesn't mean people are reading my blogs and understanding or relating to me.

I actually had so much fun tracking today, I will do it again tomorrow.

I am going to set the alarm 30 mins earlier than normal and am going to go for a walk before I go to work. I am also going to try to get to the gym for 30 mins at lunch tomorrow as well but will need to see how the day goes.

My relationship with the partner is a little tense at the moment and not really sure why. The distance between us isn't really helping as we can't just sit down and talk about things, but I also like having this distance between us. Will need to talk to my therapist about this tomorrow night when I go.

Work is also getting pretty stressful at the moment. Lending money to business clients is quite hard to do at the moment, due to competition. Its hard to compete when some banks price deals just to win them and write them at any rate. Gone are the days when clients care about paying for a personal business banking manager and on going service, now all they care about is who is giving them the lowest price. This makes my job so hard to do. The pressure is starting to come from higher than my manager and is making it extra hard. I am starting to be so over all of this and thinking about walking away from it all.

Sorry to blubber on so much/long but I need to get it out of my system.

Carlton
Never pay for the same kilo twice.

Eating out of control

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr I have lost the plot with my eating. I orginally thought it was because I was nervous about meeting the other bloggers at the bloggers dinner last saturday night. Saturday night has been and gone and I survied and had a great night. Now I know it wasn't caused by this, as I still can't stop eating. I am on 22 points on ww and eat more than that not sure how much more as I haven't seriously been tracking. I so want to lose weight and understand that it will take some time. I would like to be an 70's girl by the end of 2006 but I realise that isn't really realistic for me, so I'll refocus and say I'd love to be an 80's girl by the end of 2006.

I'm also scared about weighing in tomorrow night because of how much I feel I have put on. I also think that I now weight more than when I joined weight watchers about a month. I feel so ashamed and so fat.

I realise that tomorrow is another day and that I can start again but how do I stop overeating for the sake of overeating??????????? I also need to start exercising as well and go back to the gym, even if I just use the treadmill.

Tomorrow is another day and the restart of this journey. I will take tomorrow as a separate day and focus all my energy on tracking and doing a little bit of exercise and not worry about any other day.

I decided to create a separate blog for my tracking, exercise and weigh in results, which can be found at http://carlton-weightloss.blogspot.com/. This will see me being accountable to you all and help me to stay on track.

This is a huge move, from my point of view and welcome your comments on this. I so want to look so much better next time I meet any of you.

Carlton
Never pay for the same kilo twice.