Saturday, March 25, 2006

Weigh in today

This is Zelda who is 5 years old. She hates her picture being taken and very rarely looks at the camera.
This is Zac and he's 4 1/2 years old and weighs nearly 8 kilos. Such a lovable cat.

Thought I'd share the 2nd most important people in my life, my 2 cats. They keep my company whilst I'm away from my bf.

Weighted in today and lost another 1.05 kilos, which brings my total loss on sureslim to 6 kilos. Only 7.5 kilos to my next goal.

Very happy about my results so far.

Going away with my brother for 8 days on Tuesday and very worried about how my program will go. I'm planning on having my fruit, yoghurt and nuts for breakfast and a chicken and salad roll, nuts and an apply for luch but dinner and after dinner will be interesting. I normally drink lots and lots of alcohol when I go away with my brother and I'm not allowed to have it on sureslim. I will have to watch what I drink and make sure I do lots of walking around Melbourne and the GP track.

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Eating & stuff going on at the moment.

I lost the plot a little bit with my eating towards the end of last week and over the weekend. I think I need to put a little more variety into it. I also find it hard to stick to the plan after I've gotten home and had dinner. I really need to make sure that I'm busy and don't get bored.

Since Monday my eating has been good. I've been a little off the plan but any extra food I've had has been either fruit or say a little extra protein.

At this stage it doesn't appear to have effected my weight loss much. On my scales anyway. Just need to stay focused and keep on plan until Saturday. I also need to do more exercise as well.

I've been really busy at work this week and haven't gotten to the gym.

I'm on holidays from Friday night and am going to Melbourne for the Formula One Grand Prix on Tuesday. Can't wait for the race and to have a break from work. I've got two weeks off and have lots and lots planned.

Apart from going to Melbourne I am doing:-

1. Need to drive my dad to and from my brothers place in wollongong, as he is staying with them whilst were away.
2. Food shopping and washing when I get home.
3. Zag and Zelda, my 2 cats are going the vets for the week, so I need to take them there and collect them
4. Want to start spring cleaning my house, include going through boxes and cupboards to sort through all the stuff we have and decide if we really need it or not.
5. I also need to go and buy some new trousers to wear to work for winter. The ones I have are too big and are nearly falling off me. I'm going to sell them via e-bay.
6. I also need to buy some new underwear. Again they are too big.
7. Take my dad out for a drive one afternoon.
8. Visit mum's cremation plot. It will be six months since she's gone when we come back from Melbourne. That will be an emotional day.

I also want to price some new wooden blinds for my place. I can't afford them at the moment but if I know how much they cost, I can save for them. Will also look at replacing the toilet and hot water system when I'm away as well.

Boy just looking at this list makes me tired. So much to do in just 2 short weeks and I'm away in Melbourne for 7 days of it.

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Cosmetic changes to my home

I've been thinking for a while its time to do some cosmetic changes to the inside of my townhouse.

Things I need to do:-

1. Re-paint all rooms. I like to have neutral colours but I might include a feature wall in each room.
2. Modernize the bathroom.
3. I also need to replace the hotwater system and toilet in the next few months as they are starting to play up and cost me money to fix.
4. I tend to be a keep lots and lots of things and feel that it time to go through things and decide if I really need the stuff I have or not. Also do a good clean of the whole house at this stage.

Might start some of this when I'm on holidays in a few weeks time.

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Exercise 15/03/06

Just back from gym. I originally went to do my normal 30 min workout but today decided to extend it until 45 mins.

I go at lunchtimes to ensure that 1. I exercise and 2. that I have a break from the office.

Today I did:-

7 1/2 mins on the stepper
(haven't done this for a while and could have pushed my self to do the whole 10 mins but decided not too).

15 mins on the treadmill

10 mins on the x-trainer (god I love this machine as it burns lots and lots of calories, but need to build up to 30-40 mins again)

12 1/2 mins ont he treadmill

Overall I burnt 500 calories. I'm a little tired at the moment but feel so good as well.

Results so far on Sureslim

2/3/06 I got my sureslim program and weighed in at 103.5 kilos.

11/3/06 weighted in at 99.95 kilos (lost 3.55 kilos).

Today I weighed in on my scales at 98.9 kilos. I'm on my way to my goal this week of losing 1.5 kilos. I need to be 98.45 by Saturday.

Off to the gym at lunchtime to burn some more calories.

I've been watching the Aussie version of the biggest loser and can't get my head round that they burn 2500 calories per day and only lose between 1-4 kilos for the girls and 2-6 for the guys. They must be cheating or something.

Exercise 14/03/06

Work is so busy at the moment, it appears everyone wants to see me before I go on holidays in 7 (work days) time. Not that I'm counting. I didn't get to they gym yesterday which I was a little annoyed about.

I decided to wash my car last night cause it hadn't been washed for months. I also took it to a car wash that you do it yourself and get lost of great upper body exercise. You got to hate it, when it rains the day after you wash your car. Yes its raining in Sydney today and whilst we need it, my nice clean car is going to get dirty again. Just hate when that happens. After washing my car, I went and did the grocery shopping and spent 30 mins walking around Coles.

I noticed last night as I was walking through Coles that there is so much chocolate in the supermarket at the moment and its not just because of easter. Chocolate is a big danger food for me and it was so tempting to buy some, but I know that if I do, I will eat it all and I will not get to my goal. I kept thinking as I saw the chocolate, that if I buy it and eat it, I will not lose 1.5 kilos this week. Normally I don't put pressure on myself to lose a certain amount of weight a week, this week is an exception as if I lose 1.5 then I will have lost 5 kilos in 2 weeks on Sureslim.

During my walk I decided to walk through every idle, even though I only needed fruit, vegs, cat food and diary items.

Exercise summary

Car wash = 20 mins
Grocery shopping 30 mins.

So far so good this week and I'm planning on going to the gym at lunchtime today.

Monday, March 13, 2006

Gym 13/03/2006

I went to the gym today and boy was it a struggle as I so hated the music playing. I'm thinking of taking my mp3 player and listening to my own music.

I did manage to burn 355 calories and did 10 mins running on treadmill, 10 mins level 10 on cross trainer and 10 minutes warm down on treadmill.

I must stay focused this week so I get to my 5 kilo total loss goal.

Saturday, March 11, 2006

My 2 cats

Zelda my 5 year old cat.

Zac my 4 and a half year old cat.

I'd thought I'd share my two cats with your all. I got Zac and Zelda nearly 4 years ago from the animal welfare league at Hoxton Park in Sydney NSW, after I had to put my previous cat Teddy down as he had terminal cancer.

They mean the world to me and keep me company whilst my bf is away.

First Weigh in on Sureslim

I weighted in this morning on for the first time on Sureslim and I lost 3.55 kilos. Bring on my first goal of 5 kilos lost. Only 1.45 kilos to go. Better start thinking about which one I want.

When I got my program I weighted in at a huge 103.5 kilos and now I weigh 99.95. I also broke the magic 100 kilo mark again. This time I am determined never to go back. I did have a few slip ups on the program this week but hasn't seemed to make much difference.

This coming week I will exercise everyday and post my results. I will also stick to the program as I would love to make my first goal of 5 kilos lost this coming week.

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Good day

I had another good day on sureslim and so far so good. I'm planning my meals and preparing my lunch the night before. This way I know what I am eating and I'm organised. I am also enjoying the program and feel so alive and feel I have lots to live for (a big step for me as I've was diagnosed with clinical depression in July 2005).

I love being organised and knowing what's happening in my life. I don't couple well with sudden changes or uncertain situations.

Decided to do some shopping on the internet tonight and bought my bf a present - well its a belated birthday present. He's in to learning to play the guitar and at the moment is he is borrowing a guitar. So I bought him one, he doesn't know yet. It will arrive in a few days but he will have to wait till he comes home to get it. Can't wait for that too happen.

Whilst his home coming brings up mixed emotions I do miss him so much.

One of the things I've noticed during the past week, is now that I'm focused on my eating healthy food again, my whole attitude is changing. I'm also allowing myself to feel emotions (both good and bad) again and starting to living life again.

I also, so hate the feeling of being depressed. Walking around like nothing matters, feeling like I've lost the will to live, feeling like a corpse and that I have nothing to live for. So many people just don't understand depression. They think you can click your fingers and it will all go away and you will be happy again. I can tell you that is certainly not the case. It is so hard to battle his illness, so hard to live normally. Please don't be overly concerned about me, I am getting help, taking medication and am starting to get on top of things again. Just every so often I go back into my deep and that's very deep, dark world of depression and let the world just go by without me being a participant. Even my darling bf doesn't always understand me or have patience with me.

Life can be very hard and tough but very pleasant and joyfull at the same time. At the moment I'm taking one day at a time and one meal at a time.

Here's to happier times and memories. Here's to getting control of my life and losing my excess weight and getting to my goal of 60 kilos.

Tuesday, March 07, 2006


I went back to the gym at luch time today and feel really good about it. I did 10 mins on the x-trainer and 20 mins on the treadmill.

Still feeling good about things and can't wait to weigh in on Saturday and see how well I've gone this week.

Monday, March 06, 2006

Feeling Good

I had such a great day today. I felt so alive and on top of things. I know its early on in my new program and I think that between this and some positive thinking things are turning around.

Doing two jobs didn't even spoil things.

Also had a great conversation with bf tonight. I've really missed him today and can't wait to see him again.

Sunday, March 05, 2006


Well the weekend has been interesting on my new program. Lots of temptation and some I have not been able to resist but overall I think its been ok.

Eating every 5 hours can be a little tough and being restricted with what food I can eat can be a challenge as well, specially visiting bf and friends.

Bf and I had a rather frank chat this afternoon, which was good. I explained about the sure slim program and why I felt I had to change from ww to sure slim which is a lot more restrictive. I think he understands why. We are taking it one day at a time but things have promise. Communication and expectations are out biggest problems. I was raised in a family environment that you didn't share your feelings or concerns but worked them out yourself. This makes it really hard for me to open up to not only him but to others as well and ask for help. It also doesn't help that we have limited contact (both my phone and in person) at the moment.

Whilst I ate some cream cake yesterday at my aunts, I was very good a visits today in that I ate before I went and drank black tea and water. When asked if I wanted something from the vending machine I said no. I've explained that under my new program I can't drink diet soft drink or eat anything from the machine. We've decided at the moment to only have 1/2 day visits to help me with my program.

Today was a good day.

Friday, March 03, 2006

First day on Sure Slim

I got my sure slim program yesterday and today is the first day on the program.

So far so good. It takes a bit of getting use to having at least 5 hours between meals but I'm sure I will get use to it. I think this week is going to be a little harder than others as my body will start to detox and get rid of all of the bad stuff. I'm expecting to feel headaches, a little tiredness, feeling unwell etc but I know it is only temporary and I will feel so much better sooner rather than later.

With the weekend coming I need to stay focused and stay on program.

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

A big cry for my Mum

Last night I was talking to my brother about my mum and how we are still letting people know that she has died 5 months ago. During our conversation, we started talking about the days leading up to her death and thoughts and feelings that we are both having. All of a sudden I started crying and couldn't stop.

I think my reactions upset my brother and he started apologising for the conversation and was a little concerned about me. I'm seen as the strong one in the family. The truth is any crying I've done has been in private and when I'm around the rest of the family I just do what ever I need to do and not focus on what I'm doing. Its kind of like auto pilot or removing any emotional attachments to my tasks. It works really well at the time, but long term its not really healthy.

Looking back at things I haven't really grieved for mum, as am seen as the strong one (even my the nurses in the hospital) and too busy organising the family to be there during mum final days, phone contact for those who couldn't or didn't feel comfortable being there during mum's final days, the funeral, mum's cremation plot, the estate, helping my brother look after dad and what to do with her remaining ashes (as they don't all fit into a cremation plot). I think my grieving process is just starting.

Can't believe it is nearly 6 months since she has gone. I still get the urge to ring her every day to chat and see how they are both going. I wonder if this urge will ever go away.

It feels good for this part of my life and my diet to be under some sort of plan at the moment. Next step is to deal with being a victim in 1991, which will help a lot of other parts of my life.

Frustrated & Excited

I was a little frustrated this morning as I still hadn' t heard about my program. It got that bad that I even rang them to see when it would be available. There only answer was soon.

Surprise suprise, tonight when I got home I got a phone call from Sure Slim telling me my program is finally ready. Guess they just hadn't received there mail when I rang.

I'm excited because I'm getting it tomorrow and can't wait to start. I also can't wait to get back into a routine and start doing things for myself instead of for others.